great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I hate nights where "I found my underwear" can be considered a victory.
Did you write "I hope this gives you aids" on my box of capn crunch?
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
Randomize
