I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
you woke me up in the middle of the night to tell me you were taking off your pants and it was not an invitation.
We did naked snow angels in 14 degree weather, you can't tell me you had more liquor at that party
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
Last night you broke a mirror, and then rolled around in the glass shards. Miraculously, there's not a scratch on you...
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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