i went to toss her salad and she had a toilet paper clinger on one of the hairs
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
The brides mom put a 6 year old in charge of me to make sure I don’t get too drunk before the wedding
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