So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Were driving two hours to st louis so we can pee on the arch. See you in the morning. I might be sober by then.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
See, it wasn't that I broke my nose having sex. Its that I forgot about the bedposts...
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
