Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
He's doing the 1:45AM lap: he goes around the bar, finds the hottest crying girl 15 minutes before close, and brings her home. I would feel bad for the girls if it wasn't such incredible genius.
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
I stole a fireplace last night.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize