you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
He told me he had more lines than a plaid shirt
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
My mom just asked me if I was gay in front of my gf
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Hey, sorry I choked you last night... I was just really excited to see you.
Best single mom victory - getting eaten out in my dodge caravan in the hospital parkade at midnight.Three words: screaming multiple orgasms.
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