Shes cool when Im fuckin smashed.....Sober.....She suuuuuuuuuuucks
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Call me next time you want to get irresponsibly drunk when we have grown up things to do the next day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
you guys have a strange definition of the word fun. I would have said dangerous, terrifying, or life-threatening. of course, bowling can now be described the same way.
Also this guy in my contact as hairy jerry sent me a pic of him shirtless and said I miss you and I have no idea who he is /when or if I met him but that's not normal?!
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I am texting my ex and my future boyfriend while eating fish and chips with my current boyfriend... How and when did I become such a terrible person???
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