D3 body, D1 cock
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I just sold a pizza for the ability to listen to spice girls.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
WHEN THE FUCK DID MCDONALD'S DECIDE TO QUIT SERVING BURGERS AT 1:00AM?
I would peed on everything
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
Hmmm, well all I'm saying is don't do anything too irrational because you miss him and are blinded by his large penis.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize