He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
**i WaNt TO sLaP mY niECe wHO ThINks iT iS cUte tO WriTE LiKE tHiS**
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
He shit in a sock dude, you can't come back from that
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I feel like my foot is being amputated. Or maybe it's the vodka. I couldn't tell you.
Tequilla is a sneaky bitch ninja that doesn't kick in until you least expect it. Then BAM! You're peeing in unconventional places.
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
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