I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
You just kept saying "they don't make cigarettes for squirrels. Yet."
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
I have a cat, a bottle of wine, and a Brazilian man. I need to catch you up on my life
Because Kyle had a tattoo kit at his house and I wanted one and all he could draw was a mustache or a stickman on fire
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
My whole life is a joke
Yeah. I’m starting to see why you drink so much.
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