I want to make a zoo with you.
So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Bro that's the last time I try to stick my penis in a bowl of jello. I can't believe your sister ate that, did she not see my dick mold
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
For a man with no legs he was surprisingly good at doggy style.
I don't know whether to high-five you or stage an intervention.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
Randomize