Would it be weird if I brought slabs of bacon with me to the beach?
two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Yes but life is bad with poopy sheets
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
the good news is that i vommed the last of my humanity last night.
welcome to the club.
You were buying shots for everyone, saying, "I got a tax refund. I'm a MILLIONAIRE."
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
The second I see you we're shot gunning beers
It's gonna be 8 o'clock in the morning
And your point is?
Marry me
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
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