So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
We just found a handle of vodka in our fridge and no one knows how it got there. God I love spring break.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Visiting Houston was a good decision for my penis.
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Got high again and all I want to do is wave this flag around
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I didn't really break out of the friend zone, as much as I blasted the doors off with high explosives and rode through on a grizzly bear...
Randomize
