Dear man in the lobby please go play whith yourself elsewhere
p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
All you kept saying was "my dick ALWAYS causes problems".
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
Someone younger than me just got married. Send help and vodka
My liver appreciates your vow of avoiding matrimony
Just bought a gingerbread house kit and pregnancy tests. Happy holidays.
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize