Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
i'm sorry, but my penis isnt the solution to your problems
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
Successfully put eye drops in while driving with my glasses on. Stoner level: expert
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
Who's the naked guy asleep in your car?
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
Never again will I go to my mom's side of the family's parties. After the bride and groom cut the head off the roasted pig together they boarded their RV and rode off into the sunset.
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