My friends, they love my intelligence
so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fucked up. I can't drink anymore. We stole a cat.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
I just need you to appreciate that this is the first time I've ever been cut off and it's at an airport bar in Philly before 1 o'clock in the afternoon.
Damn it. If you ever throw me again, take video.
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
I feel like a weird modern Betty Crocker. I'm icing a cake and looking at gay porn, if that's not an accurate portrayal of the 21st century idk what is.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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