idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
you can hold your grudge or you can accept the alcoholic treats as a peace offering. your choice
peace be with you.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
shut up and let me use my vagina as a weapon of self destruction in peace!
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