Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
i wouldn't be half as slutty if there were better things to do.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
Lauren will drop me off I'll be drunk ride you for a little bit and then you can go to sleep
sorry. that wasn't for you
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
to improve your porn experience, just imagine a slow speaking older English man narrating it all like a Nature documentary
I woke up this morning half naked, smelling like an ash tray, with an empty bottle of jack next to me, and now someone named Dora the anal explorer is texting me.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He lit my hand on fire and bought me chicken nuggets. I'm in love.
Randomize
