It was honestly like finding a clitoris in a haystack.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
Close your eyes and stop texting and think about puppies. You'll be fine.
ur not supposed to find someone to make out with when ur bf takes u to his SISTERS house to hang out with her and her husband
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
When you puked on me I said to you "we will just say that you threw some mostacholi at me"
Randomize
