how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
In my defense it was my birthday and I really wanted to do it.
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
I have vomit stuck in my nose, you should come with a warning label.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
If a baby can come out of it, so can four raquetballs.
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Randomize
