I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
He just kept pissing on the couch as we were yelling at him while he repeatedly told us "its going to be okay".
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize