No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
Why do you have Season One of Reba in your underwear drawer?
Why are you in my underwear drawer?
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
They were picking gravel out of my face for an hour. I think I took more out of the road than the road did of me.
Barfights against pavement aren't genrally won by people. Props.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
I smell of tequila and Im going to a funeral. This is my life.
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