Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
She's like a pop up book from hell.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
How many other adults do you think have slept naked under the Winnie the Pooh blanket sober?
If I wasn't planning on spend the rest of my life with you I wouldn't send you so many nudes, so fucking appreciate it
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
Randomize
