I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
i'm signing you up for texting rehab
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
You insisted on squirting shots of captain morgan in your mouth with a turkey baster by like 930.
You left me with no money to have random Chicago sex. The least you can do is pick me up an egg mcmuffin on your walk of shame back to the hotel.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
remember that party we went to sophomore year where we found that girl and had the orgy? Im totally at that house right now.
Randomize
