omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
I just had sex in a moon bounce. It is all down hill from here.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize
