My hand turned me down
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Just made a makeshift menthol by rolling a listerine strip into a regular cigarette... Poor? Who, me?
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
Use motel 8. I'll give you my credit card #. i'll pay for it cuz i care about your vagina.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
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