hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
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please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
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