Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
All I want to do is fuck in the bell tower before it leave this school. Is that too much to ask?
Now that there's no chance of him coming over to fuck anymore, I'm going to put up a one-person tent in my bedroom and live in it. My bed reminds me of him.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
She tried deep frying a banana by placing one, unpeeled, into a toaster.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
You're not gonna like every guy whose dick I put in my mouth
I was trying to come up with a reason why you shouldn't be naked in front of me, and now I have 'If you give a mouse a cookie" stuck in my head
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
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