you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
I played ping pong,drunk, with my hand instead of the paddle. And i won. I have hidden talents
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize
