i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
I think i accidentally made vodka pancakes
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
The goal for tonight is vagina. In and around. Doesn't matter who. How. Or why.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Randomize
