her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
The only way he could ever pleasure me is if he lit himself on fire and let me watch
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
wheres my face? and why is my pocket so big?
Randomize
