R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
For some reason fuck navy didn't go over quite as well as say fuck michigan;
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
then you said,"Take this damn cabbage!" although it was actually your shirt. i found you in the elevator of his building.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
LEAVE MY LITTLE DICK OUT OF THIS
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Leaves on the ground. Coffee in one hand and your man in my other. Lovely fall morning.
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
Randomize
