Y'know, without the cops, it would've just been us daydrinking,
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Randomize
