Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
george bush was a better president for first pitches than barack obama. there. i said it.
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
just passed a kid drinking a beer at 2pm. clearly it's the last day of break.
Randomize
