i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
you looked at her and told her she looks like the girl you lost your virginity to then told her you wanted to lose it to her again
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
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