dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
Florida has a way of just fucking with a person's soul and jizzing all over their hopes and dreams. Like existential bukkake.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
So after I fell off 4 times we concluded I'm not allowed to ride him anymore.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
Come over.
Look lady I can't have sex with you EVERY day. I have things to do.
Oh. My. God. I. Am. Going. To. Punch. Someone. In. The. Face. Immediately.
Randomize
