dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
In hindsight following that black guy in the ghostbusters costume was a terrible decision on everyone's part
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
Randomize
