I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
the campus cop used the word depravity in our citation.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
In brighter news I got condoms and a mattress protector today.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
We stopped mid-sex and both shotgunned a beer then got back to it. Is this what love feels like?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
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