if i died would you start the facebook group?
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
It was like an alcohol war zone and you left a soldier behind.
Best part about a crippling state-wide drought? Actually having a valid excuse for not showering
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
The only time we had a decent conversation was when he was on acid, and, like, that's not a great start to a relationship.
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
Bro I just got a hand job playing tiny wings.. Hell yea
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
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