Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
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Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
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Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
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