We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
What the hell do you have that is more important than a GIANT WATER SLIDE?
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
I supernannyed him into submission
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Say thank you and give him a blowjob.
Randomize
