All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
she just pulled a hulk hogan to make her point. no idea how it helped
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
They called it unicorn pee, and i thought that was interesting so i drank it. Please don't let me drink strangers booze again.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
Saying you need a hooker then asking me to have sex is NOT the way to get laid. Booty call 101.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Randomize
