awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
The only thing that made me get out of bed this morning was knowing that tonight, I don't plan on remembering what happened today
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
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