its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
if I could go back to kindergarten and not fuck up my life, I so would.
Just joined the godiva rewards club. Who's the fat friend now.
What kind of flower means "I want to have unprotected sex with you, preferably from behind?" because thats the message I'd really like to send on Valentines Day
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
i dont think my parents would of encouraged me to save years of birthday money if they knew what i would eventually spend it on
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
YAS. BRING CRAB.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis