how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Old woman told me I looked like her son and then she started explaining to me how she wanted me to fuck her
Naw, the sex dungeon had to come down so we could build a nursery. Cause and effect really.
You're asking your pregnant booty call to go to a funeral with you?
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
Randomize