I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
At some point I made a semi-conscious decision that i was okay with sleeping in my own vomit.
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Bro. Some kids just drive-by judged the shit outta me.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
Brandon just showed up at my place with a florida state cheerleader he met in vegas durin spring break. His life is a fucking movie
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
Randomize