Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
My liver and I thought we knew what we signed up for. We were wrong.
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Is girls night deemed a success when you piss the bed?
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I have been drunk every time I've gone to mexico. I do not remember mexico.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Yesterday we were fuck buddies and today I'm meeting his mom. That escalated quickly.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Randomize
