ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
I vomitted in the hotel where they film gossip girl last night. Everywhere.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
I'm giving you an age limit on the people you're allowed to hit on at steak n shake at 3 am. I can't see straight and I want a cheeseburger. You want dick. I'm sure we can't order at least one of those. But maybe.
The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
I accidentally sent a snap of my puss with the Republican filter... Totally killed his boner
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
Randomize
