hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
Words of wisdom-never eat a peanut-butter covered banana on a construction site ever again
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Idk I've been drinking all day and they're having me blow shit up. Like dont let the drunk chick play with fire and explosives. Common sense 101. I will fuck something up
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
