I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Its Nebraska, I'm sure im not the first person to wake up hungover in a corn field.
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
I tried to prevent a bar fight. By convincing a guy whacked out on Molly to slap the ass of everyone who was arguing and shout "WOO" each time. I'm proud, surprised, and intrigued that it calmed everyone down so quickly...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
Blacked out and Irish exited last night. At dinner. On a Sunday.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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